please advice on relationship from mature people who can help me out!!!?
she started dating someone off and on for 4 years. finally she met me and started dating june 13. idk what we were thinking but we talked about having a baby immediately. so we had sex and tried getting pregnant. a month later july 27 she found out she was pregnant. she told me she was shocked because she had a miscarriage october of 07, and thought she just cudnmt have a baby at all period. so was this a experiment on me? why me if so? i had to go to school and jen said she wud move with me to support me. up until the week before i left it was cool, then she laid it on me that she didnt wanna go, and made up excuses that she didnt wanna live with 3 other guys and she wanted to stay near her family. so i almost didnt graduate and finish my dream but i fought through it and graduated. while i was at skool it was hard to focus because she had my mind screwed up. I would drive home then back then home then back numerous times. when i would drive home she would only see me when she wanted to. i drove 3 and a half hrs, which i didnt wanna do, and she decides she wud take a nap before seeing me. if i drive home make the commitment to see me. i saw a counselor to help me through the trouble and even got my medicine changed and it helped. i started getting my feelings under control. at school she would talk so nasty and her mouth was unbelieveable. their was no making my point clear b/c she would come back with some obnoxious comment or remark that really hurt a sensitive guy like me. it took alot out of me and stressed me out. let me take you back before i left for school. we were at a stop light and i planned on finishing school via online. we were at a red light and she says "im so happy everythings going my way." thats selfish isnt it? we went to the casino for a night which my mother treated us to a nice accomodated room, if that wasnt enough i wake up and see she had talked to her ex bf for a half hour a couple nights ago WHICH she forgot to tell me about. i bought into it seeing how they just broke up. i come home to visit a weekend and i see they were texting. obviously i was upset and told her to leave. instead of trying to make me see differently, she nicely, got up and left and didnt say a word. wouldnt you fight for the one you love.? so i then tell her to quit her job trying to be there for her. i didnt want her workingh in that type of environment. i told her i would take care of her threw her pregnancy which i did. one night we werrent feeeling the baby, she wanted to wait till the next morning to call the doc but i took it upon my self to bring her right then and there. even i had to work at 9am the next morning in manlius, a half hour drive. for her birthday i paid over $2,000 in her bills so she would be stress free and we could start a clean slate and she wouldnt have to worry about not having money, but still to this day im called an asshole and fake. one night before school she told me she wud be over to my house after she went to her friend yo yo's. well was she rly even there? b/c she never came over and didnt even call to tell me that. so as im skipping around here i forgot to mention i asked her how this decision even came about. she said we decided to get pregnant when we were drunk. i asked her if she regretted it then she said she will never regret the baby but she wished she wud of gotten to no me a little bit more. we didnt get to no e/o until she got pregnant. i am always very respectful to her parents and they like me. she doesnt give mine the time of day and im a family guy, thats a problem. she said she doesnt no who my mom is but she isnt gonna kiss her ass, shes 66! have some respect. she was into drugs bad in her day and had problems like got kicked out of the house. i straightened her out a little but she is very selfish. yeah she does clean the apartment and make me dinner but i work full time and pay the rent, utilities, groceries, and cable phone and internet, something i cant do alone.she keeps talking bout how she cant wait to go out and drink once the baby comes out. she doesnt wanna go anywhere in public w me but when we fight she goes anywhere with whoever. if i dont spend 24/7 with her she gets very emotional and blames it on me. i have a lil bro i chilled w my whole life and i spent the weekend w him and she says i never have any time for her anymore she says. we live together hows that possible. i work all day and wanna watch the game, ill b in the living room shell b in the room watching lifetime or some boring program, if she wants to spend time she can come accompany me in the living room. she is so down on her self whenever i tell her shes beautiful she comes back with she has a double chin and shes fat. i hve doner this and complimented her for 8 months but its gets old when she doesnt appreciate it. however she thinks is how shell act. its all her her her. she like gangsters and i have turned into be a respectful young man and that must n
Public Comments
- You have on your hands a self centered brat. You take care of her and all she crap all over you. If she was my old lady and went with some other guy when got mad at if me If it were anyone other than my grandfather I would put her clothes outside all and go to bed. The only;y way back in for would be to grow up
- need more room, try "additional details" Honestly, all of your problems seem to be about your relationship with her clearly,...what's up with the child?? And, you should know that women change when they're expecting. By the way, there's nothing wrong with lifetime, have you actually ever given it a try?
- Dude you are a sucker. She's cheating on you, using you, playing you, disrespecting you, taking your money, emotionally abusing you. And she's holding over your head that she's having your baby so you'll be too guilty to leave. She's also obviously deadbeat and self abusive, and her drug problem is very likely the reason she had a miscarriage in the first place, and also very likely she'll be a horrible mother, stick you for child support(if the child is even yours) and mess up your future. Dude, a few nights of drunk raw sex and you'll be suffering for the rest of your life. That's a high price to pay. Its your fault. You never put your foot down in the relationship. You let her get away with disrespecting you, you run to her like a little doggy when she says "here boy" and your putting your life on hold in the hopes that you can make the relationship work, while all you're doing is giving her more reason to hold on to her bad habits First of all be a man, get your balls together and put your foot down. Don't stand for her bullsh*t anymore. Seriously consider kicking her out and sending her back to live with her mother if she continues to act the fool. Get a paternity test and make sure that you're the father, and run like hell if you're not. And as a measure of security, build a case to get your child away from her. If she's a drug using junkie with no job who likes to go out and is still sleeping with her ex, you have a strong case to demonstrate that she's unfit to take care of the baby and take full custody. And as a last resort leave her and deal with the child support situation if you have to. Most important, stop stooping and being a lapdog to this woman. Be asertive, be an as*hole if you have to, but don't ever tolerate disrespect from any woman, even if she's the mother of your child.
