CHRISTIAN GUYS!!.....Heart hurts...need boyfriend advice.?
Had an amazing 5 1/2 months with my 32 year old boyfriend. He told me he loved me first early on. He told me all the time we "fit so well together" were "meant to be together", and that it was not a matter of "whether or not" we'd get married....but when. He was divorced (three years ago) a d she left him. Now our church says he is not free to date untill he fills out the remarriage paperwork, and we are given permission by our church. We both are serious about our faith and honoring God...so changing churches is not an option. Although we were not "allowed" to date until the paperwork was turned in and we were given permission..we have been dating...and things have been amazing....until the past three weeks. We started picking on each other's flaws a lot. His complaint was that I was too clingy and didn't have enough of a hobby of my own. My complaint was that he was wanting more and more time for his hobbies, and was sort of a mamma's boy. We talked about it a lot and decided we still loved each other and accepted each other as we were. But with the picking on each other the past few weeks...we really hurt each other and needed space and time to heal. On top of it...he turned in the remarriage request form with the church and it struck me one day that God will not bless sin...so if we wanted God to hear our prayer that we could be together, so I called him at work and told him we needed to start being obedient to God's authorities (the minister's request that we not date) and just be friends so that there was a chance for blessing before they made their decision on paperwork. All this time I still thought our love was strong and things would work out no matter what. He told me he agreed and that we should honor God and be friends and that after two weeks of doing a few things that hurt each other, he needed "time to relax." Now, we who usually email and see each other every day...have not really spoken all week since this happened. I am worried I am losing him (his love and hope for us.) I asked him the other night how he felt about all of this and told him I made the decision to be friends to KEEP us and give us a chance in God's blessing at being married...NOT to seperate. He said that before he was sure we'd be married, but after seeing the things I said and did that hurt him these past few weeks...he's not sure. I appologized tearfully time and time again and told him I'd make it up to him and that we'll get through this. Now he's not talking much. Just says he needs time and space to "relax, think, and figure this out." GUYS>>>WHAT's GOING ON? Before HE was the one that always wanted to work it out and insisted he loved me, we would be together, we would get married, etc... etc...and I WAS THE ONE who made the call to be friends... Guys...what do I do to make him happy/ keep/ win his love and trust back? Christian viewpoints are appreciated, for I feel those that don't believe are not on the same page as us. I miss him so much and truly thought we could still hang out and be friends until we are permitted to be together again..that we'd work through this. Tell me guys... what do i do? any advice is appreciated...from anyone. Yes, we did mess up and give into temptation and sleep together. but repented together on our knees. He loves the Lord so much i though i'd earn his respect and love in protecting our relationship from this temptation. i said a few mean things that week such as " you didn't have to make a half-hearted attempt to see me. Genuineness is far more appreciated. Some day maybe I'll find a man who will really love me and make me happy." I REGRET THIS NOW. I know it hurt him and I didn't mean it...I told him i was sorry and didn't mean it.
Public Comments
- why not ATHIESTS? D: im somewhat offended.
