Another Closeted Teen Question? And Some Dating Advice?

Ok, so a little background story of me. I'm a 14 year old teen. I live in a fairly homophobic European country, but I'm only half European. I was mostly raised in American schools and stuff. I come from a middle to upper class social level. I was 100% sure about 1 year ago that I was gay, but I felt totally alone. So I came out to my old best friend about 6 months ago (we aren't so close anymore because I started avoiding her cause of her drug problems). So apart from her, I haven't told anyone else that I'm gay. Many of my friends suspect of course, and even asked me several times, but whenever the topic comes up, I simply from reflex say no. I wanted to come out to everybody but I am scared at what their reaction might be. My mom would cry, but eventually awknowledge that I can't help being who I am (I overheard my dad and mom discuss it and she said it's not a choice, but people are just born that way, and my dad said he thinks it's a choice). My dad would shout and make me feel embarrassed of who I am and would probably ground me untill I "become straight". My brother would totally accept me. And my friends would be sad (especially the girl ones, cause that means they don't have a chance with me), but they would love me I think. And the other people...well lets just say they will hate me and call me a faggot. So I sometimes have these moments when I want to come out to the whole world, but then I cower up, and I don't know what to do. I really need some advice on what to do. And I've also been so lonely. My brother has his girlfriend, all my friends are hooking up with each other, but not just that, I need a gay guy to just know I'm not alone. There's like no gay guys here that are out. And I just need ways to find some gay guys..but I think I need to come out and they will start coming towards me. I have had some people add me on msn cause I asked for 14-16 year olds to add me on msn and they all end up to be some 14 year old obese grosse guys who want nothing else but webcam sex. Seriously -.-. Any tips? And there's no GSA at my school or anything...it's a pretty homophobic environment. Any questions or extra details that you need added just ask me. Thanks! :D

Public Comments

1. Best thing to do is come out to someone you trust completely, like your brother or a friend. See what their reaction is, but only do it if you are comfortable with telling them. If they react positively, then you can rest assured that you can talk to them about it. Who knows, maybe they will even hook you up with someone (that happened to me). And once you've told someone, it will become easier to tell others. Main thing is, do not be ashamed of who you are.
2. Im 14 years old and gay. I haven't came out yet either. I think it's best too wait until you're 16 or 17 years old to come out because what if you change your mind, then your screwed.
3. I totally understand your situation. But my advice is not to be in such a hurry to do it right now. You are very young, and since you're living in such an extremely homophobic environment you will put yourself in a very vulnerable situation. Coming out isn't always an easy thing for most people---even when they get older. It really depends on your individual circumstances and your ability to access support from somewhere if you do decide to come out and you don't get that support from your family or friends. Then its going be be really tough because you would have exposed yourself and doing so may cause you to feel even more isolated and lonely. Although you're young you seem to be a very smart guy. Seems you pretty much have things figured out but aren't sure if you're ready to make the move. I recommend trying something else first. Go to www.gayteens.org and see if you can hook up with other guys your age in your area. This website has links to gay teens all over the world, so it may be a way for you to meet others. Good luck!
4. I am in a fairly similar situation...I am just dying to go to college somewhere far away from where I am...sometimes I don't think I can wait that long...2 years to go...but I'll get through it somehow...and so will you...though it seems that you might not find anyone where you are right now but you might...until then there are always people to talk to online...and not all of them are creepers hopefully =P
5. Come out to the people you believe will accept you one by one. It's better than living a lie. Good luck!!!