As a single parent, how do you except/deal/handle this issue?

I am a single 37 yr old, attractive full time father to an awesome 13 yr old girl. I have her all but 4 nights a month. She just moved in with me in December and I love having her with me. However, it has turned my social life upside down. I am virtually undateable. I have met a few great woman but, I think they get frustrated I cant give them the time the want or deserve. I need ot be home for her and obvioulsy that means, very limited time to date and so forth. It is starting to take a toll on me. Any tips or advice on how to except and/or deal with this?

Public Comments

1. She will be 18 in 5 yrs.. GL
2. I don't know how you would except this, but maybe you could accept it?
3. It's time for you to spend more time to your child. Sooner or later, she will be dating too. She will not have much time with you. If you're dating great women they would understand your situation. For me, that is a plus factor to a man. Your child should always comes first.
4. Do you have anyone that you trust as a friend that would be willing to watch your daughter or have her over while you do go out on a date? Or does your daughter have friends that she could spend the night with or hang out with while you have some time alone for you? I think it's important to still make time for yourself if you are interested in dating, I would talk to your daughter prior to the date or dating to make sure you are both on the same page and that she feels respected and part of the process. And I think it's important that you don't introduce a lot of women to your daughter, only anyone you are serious about... EDIT: I have read some of the other answers and I completely agree that once you have met a woman she should completely respect your relationship with your daughter and know that is a HUGE part of your life. However, at the beginning of a relationship I think a couple needs time alone to cultivate their relationship and then introduce time with your daughter. I can see where a woman is coming from just wanting some of your time, as in all relationships, time is important. It’s finding the balance and doing it the right way where your daughter does not feel left out or disrespected at all.
5. I say that if they don't understand the time you need with your daughter, they aren't worth it. I would be patient and wait for a woman who understands and encourages you to spend time with your daughter. Dating isn't everything. = ) Take your daughter on a few "father-daughter" dates. I loved it when I was little, and on Valentine's day my dad would always take me out somewhere. ^^
6. Maybe you could have her sleep someone else house, as babysitting! You being a single father does not mean you need to stop your dating life we all need that regardless. Try talking to your daughter and say you are very happy she is staying by you but there is going to be nights that you need to go out and she is going to have to say by her grandparents, friends house or so on.. Just try to not over doit because she need you to be around as much as possible.
7. A good way to accept it is to rationalize it like this- Any woman who would expect you to put her before your child isn't the kind of woman you would want in your life anyway. You will find a special woman who will recognize that your daughter comes first. To deal with it- Plan dates around your time with your daughter. If you know she is having a sleep over at a friend's house or if she is going to her mothers- plan dates on those nights. Explain to your date that you have a daughter at home and that it would be best to rearrange the schedule accordingly. Also, lunch dates aren't a bad idea. Take a date to lunch, while your daughter is at school. You can have early dates. At 13 years old, I don't see a problem with leaving your daughter at home for a few hours. Just call it an early night and explain to your date that you have a 13 year old daughter waiting at home. Good luck!
8. wel i think at 13 she is able to stay home by herself. if ur dating only go out once a week for a few hours. if she has any girlfriend send her over there if ur worried about leaving her home alone. if u meet someone n she wants to spend extra time with u bring her home, not all the women that could get confusing for ur daughter but jus watch a movie together of all of u go out golfing bowling movies dinner. im sure ur date would find it cute that u bring ur daugter with u. as long as you know ur date well enough. at 13 she should have things of her own to do also. ask her if she wants to go to the mall with some friends.
9. Does she ever stay all night at a friends or is there other family close by that she can stay at some? It is great that you have her, but you have to do things for yourself too. A lot of women will respect a man that is a single father taking care of his kid as there are many fathers out there that won't do half of that. Enjoy having your daughter around and talk to her....ask her what she thinks about it all...trust me, they are smarter at that age than you think and it will give you a chance to grow closer with your daughter. When I met my now husband, he was a single father raising a boy and a teenage girl (10 and 14) We met on the weekend they were at their mothers - I understood that he had them and could not invest as much time, but I respected him for taking care of his kids and that led to a much deeper appreciation for him and a much closer friendship as we did a lot of talking on the phone instead.
10. At 13, your daughter should be old enough to understand the situation if you explain it to her. She should be able to share you, so the key is communication. Take it slow at first. Don't go on any weekend trips yet. You want your daughter to develop a feeling of security in her new home. Get her a pre-paid cell phone in case she needs to contact you while you're away (so you'd need one also), or some other method of instant communication. So that she knows you will be there if she needs you, but don't allow her to misuse it, Let the leash get longer a bit at a time until she can be comfortable with your absence. Look into a group called *Parents without Partners* to see how other single parents handle it.
11. She is 13 If she is normally trustworthy then in my opinion she is old enough to spend an evening by herself at home . You can then spend an evening out with someone. If you have a cellphone for emergencies , or are on good terms with a neighbor even better. If she has other friends her age you could maybe arrange a rotating slumber party. One week at your place , other weeks at her friends , maybe once a month. Any woman you date is going to have to accept that the child needs to be a priority.