Need advice on how to break free from somebody?

I know your first thought is - just do it. be strong. But, Ive had this boyfriend for over a year. He's a good guy...but...as far as holding a job or driving a car or holding up any responsibility ...forget it. Im not in love with him but I got too close to him for too long. Now, I want to move on... but he wont accept the fact that we are different people and want different things. I want to date other people but I cant obviously while im still officially with him. I dont have many friends to keep my company because Im always so busy working or going to school. I dont go out to bars and I dont have ways of connecting with other people. How do I end a relationship without making myself miserable and depressed? I think Im only staying with him because I dont want to be lonely and this is true. But, how do you get past being lonely?

Public Comments

1. You have to learn how to be alone and it isn't always easy. You need to find ways to get out and meet friends. Maybe the gym? I occupy my free time with books, exercise...just whatever makes me happy. You don't have to be with another person to feel happy. In fact your happiness should never be based on another person. Being lonely is normal. I like to volunteer in my free time. I think school is an excellent place to meet people. Maybe extra cirricular activities, intramural sports, clubs, etc....You will be fine! Don't stay with someone who makes you unhappy just from fear of being alone. You don't know what will happen until you try. good Luck!
2. time...... you will find other things to do and it will keep your mind off of him.
3. stop contact from them............avoid doing things that remind you of them
4. just keep in mind that just like you, he also deserve someone who can reciprocate his affection. you are just depriving yourself and himself the chance to be truly happy with someone who can appreciate you for whoever you are. Truth sometimes hurts but also remember that it's honesty that can TRULY make us happy in life...good luck and be gentle in life, it's too short to be wasted with wrong decisions.
5. the best thing is that you know for sure that you are not in love.i wouldnt talk about absolute break off for i believe that loneliness is the worst thing in life, but a hedge in between relations is important, widen your social circle though social places, you can get past loneliness by cultivating hobbies.
6. It will not be easy for sure. Realizing that you cannot do this alone is the first step though. Good for you! You need to know that It's okay to ask for help. Ask for help or advice from those people in your life whom you trust, maybe a close friend or a teacher. If you attend church, ask your minister, pastor or youth pastor for advice. This will help you with the feeling miserable and depressed part because you will have support. As for being lonely, I can so relate. We are created to love and be loved. Not by just one but by many. I know you said that you don't have much time but you owe it to yourself to reach out and get involved. It's so easy to emerse yourself in those things that are right in front of you, that need your immediate attention; like work and school. You will find that you will not be miserable or depressed when your life is filled with other people who care for you and who you can have fun with. I hope this helps. Even though I don't know you, I will keep you in my prayers.