Dating dilemma from a single parent?

I am a single mom to 2 year old. I have know this guy for a while now and actually meet him years ago through my ex. We have been hanging out for a few months now and recently started dating. He does not have kids but is completely acepting of the fact that I do. I mentioned to him that I want someone in my life who is as interested in my son as I am and his response was his main interest was me, not my child (but again, he accepts the situation) I do not know how to take this. He told me he is not trying to take over the father position to my son but at the same time he seems alittle hesitant when interacting with him. I do not know if I am reading too much into this or that is an expected response from someone who does not have children. They get along well when they are together too, so I dont know if I should be focusiing more on our delvoping relationship and his and my sons will develope over time or this is too soon. Any advice would be very welcomed. For the record, he never said he didnt care about my son, he said he is not trrying to be his father, which is understandable. He doesnt have kids and I get that this is new to him (and I). We do do things as the 3 of us, like dinner and what not and its mainly to see how they interet with eachother. Also, my son does not know we are dating seeing as we do not act any different in front of him as I do with any other friend. As far as he is concerned, this is just one of mommy's friends. As far as expectations that I have, I dont really know what they are. That is what I am still trying to figure out. Being single and trying to date with a child is so much harded then anythig I would have imagined because its not about just me anymore. And I do put my son first.

Public Comments

1. he should be including your son on some dates (maybe to the park).
2. You just NEEEEEEVER know. but if you are seeing red flags remember who comes first in your life.
3. He has told you to your face that he don't care anything about your child. I don't no why women sell there self short when it come to no good men. What more does he have to say for you to get it. He don't do kids. How about you drop him and find someone that is going to love you and your child. Not just you. Because when you had that child it stop being about you. And it started being about us. Get with it Girl.
4. As an adult child of a single mother, I strongly recommend that you thoroughly discuss your expectations of him regarding your son. Your son is your number one priority, and if you don't make sure that this guy is THE guy before your son gets too attached, that could be the start of a pattern that may one day cause your son to resent you. Growing up, my mom would introduce me to her boyfriends and they'd go out for awhile, seemed nice, and either I would get attached, or not like them at all. It's great that your son and this man get along, but do you really think he could ever see him as his own son? That's something you really need to think about when deciding whether to pursue a long term relationship with him.
5. what do you expect, the dude hasn't been around kids. Neither have I and that's why I would never date someone with kids. Too much drama and unrealistic expectations. You are already worried about him developing a relationship with your kid...weird. You girls need to understand that while you have a child, the guy is dating you first.
6. i have been with my partner for 3 yrs now and he is step dad to my 2 sons, like urs at first he wasn't interested in them much and wanted to spend time with just me, but as time went on i got him involved with the kids more and slowly he fell in love with them too. it did take a while tho, if he is showing a little interest thats a good sign every thing in life takes time to grow. i'm now have a son with him and will be getting married soon, looking back 3 yrs ago i thought this would never happen. its best at first that he doesn't get to close just incase it doesn't work out as it will upset the child.
7. When it comes to issues like this,everybody is quick to blame the guy for not being man enough to accept responsibility for a child he knows nothing about, on the contrary i give kudos to the guy for saying his mind.I have been in the shoes of your guy before, all i wanted the girl to say was 'my baby will never get in the way of my love for you' I would have loved her and in the long run accept her baby as part of me too,but she kept saying this and that about her baby, I had to leave her and to tell you the truth I loved her... If you cant say this just shut up about it, he is a man he will figure things out...Cheers